you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
