We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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