The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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