i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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