perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
