theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
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