Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
