i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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