her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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