Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
