Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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