Say something about gay babies.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Naked. naked and bneed help.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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