Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
