For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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