what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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