Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
