I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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