you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
