someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
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