There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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