the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
