i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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