i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize