a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
