I feel like I'm in dance class right now
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
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He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
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So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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