so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
