fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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