Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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