I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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