Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
She's the barista slut.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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