Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
