Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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