do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Randomize
