why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
