But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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