come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
