We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Randomize
