Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
