I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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