I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
vagina is talking i cant
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Randomize
