You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
