She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Randomize