Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
