problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
