chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
