There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
