nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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