Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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