You're completely useless in the revolution.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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