it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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