Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
